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Counsel: Husband Wife Relationship

Q:

Assalam o alaikum sir!! I am suffering from great mental stress and you are my last hope sir please help me.... i want to disccuss about my married life state which is becoming unbearable for me my husband and i am living togather but we didnt talk from last 5 months as husband wife talk to each other he didnt even sleelp with me from 5 months as he is sleeping with his mother we have 2 kids mashaAllah a daughter Hajra of 4 years and son Abdullah 2 years old .... my husband didnt fulfill his duties as a father and husband i tried often to talk to him about this but he said there is nothing to talk like that i know him he is not interested in any other woman but he is not interested in me as well i love him so much i took care of his house children and his mother so much even in these responsibilities i forget about myself my health which is not well now i have permanent headach and my mucsules always remain pulled.. i am tierd now i prayed alot i always use to read "YA WADOOD YA KABEER" i cannt discuss my situation to any one but you are the my only hope he juat come home to sleep and change clothes i do not neglect my duties as wife i tried my level best to take care him... please let me know where is problem my husband is a phsychologist by profession and has his own mental and rehab clinic

A:

Alaikum salam.
 
The situation you are facing must be difficult for you but you need to remember that there is no dead end and you can always start to make things better.  
Instead of talking and explaining your husband, try showing your love only through your actions. Psycologists do alot of talking and problem solving for people and they find it hard if someone comes up with advising them. Actions here would play a remarkable role of his improvement with your commitment both emotionally and physically.  
Maybe you can start off by saying the best things to him in small sentences then continue with your actions in showing love for him. Try doing this strictly at least for 40 days if not more. You will definitely get the result InshAllah.  
You be put off for sometime but if you really claim to love him and save your marriage, then do your very best by praying to Almighty Allah for help. You should then entrust all your affairs to Allah who is sure to give you the results of your struggle.
Make his favorite food and don't ever be cold towards him. Start making warm conversations whenever he comes even if doesn't happen to be often.  
Try releasing your stress by going to swim even if it be once a week. Water does great to the body and soul and releases ample of stress too.
I pray it works out for the best for you and your spouse inshAllah.
 
Salma Alavi.