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Hurting Small Kittens

Q:

Dear Sir, Salaam Walekum, I have got 4 kittens in my office with a mother cat. I play with the kittens and when they start scratching me I misbehave with them, I beat them and mistreat them. They have started hating me now. I can't control my anger around them. I realize this many a times but I still end up doing the same acts. I think I am loosing my mind because of anger issues. I know beating animals is not allowed in Islam, but I am still doing it. Everytime I think that I won't do it again, I end up doing the same thing.I think it's like I like hurting and torturing them. Sir, I need help I am turning out to the man I have always hated being. I used to dislike people hurting animals and now I am doing the same thing. I don't even know if Allah will forgive me for this. Please help me. Your detailed response (if possible) will be appreciated. Regards, Fayaz Mohammed

A:

Waalykum salam 

 
Thank you for your Question. 
 
Alhamdulillah, your question itself shows that you still have this very kind and polite side that wants to put away this cruel act. 
 
It is indeed very sad to treat such little souls this way. More so because they can’t even complain regarding it to anyone. However the one they are complaining to is the one who has all your affairs in HIS hands too. 
They are complaining to someone who has all power over everything, Allah (swt) 
 
This is indeed a test whether you fear Allah or not. If there was a cctv camera in your room, would you treat the kittens the same way!? 
Then why should it be different when Allah is all-Hearing and all-Seeing! وَهُوَ السَّمِيعُ الْبَصِيرُ:  11:42
 
If you feel you can not control your anger and keep on doing this, kindly take them away from your office and put them somewhere where they will be more safer and happier InshaAllah 
 
Hope this is solved 
 
Kind regards 
Naajiya Jaffery